Sex isn’t always perfect and magical. However, there are occasions when all it takes is a little something to boost you and improve the reports’ quality.
A study from the University of Illinois that was reported in Psychologies magazine found that improving your sex life would only require changing your perspective on relationships.
It goes without saying that you shouldn’t view your sexual relationships as a restriction, a household chore, or a must. Instead, they ought to be regarded as a hobby. According to study co-author Liza Berdychevsky, “when sexual activity is pleasurable, freely chosen, and motivated, it equates to most leisure activities.”
A detail that changes everything
This study also explains how being creative might boost one’s sexual drive. According to the study, 41% of those surveyed used the restrictions to experiment with new positions, 26% looked into sex toys, and 13% played sexual role-playing games.
As a result, the study notes that some of the participants “reported an increase in sexual desire, as well as a greater variety, frequency and quality of sexual intercourse.” Obviously, don’t question anything and just enjoy the experience.
Here, she and other sex experts provide tips on how to have more (and better) sex with your spouse. Her advice: “Prioritize sex as much as any component of the relationship, and seek to bring back the diversity and surprise.”
1. Never stop sharing your desires.
As time passes, passion wanes, according to Morse. “Take charge and speak with your partner when you feel the fire starting to go out. Expect it, and expect to work if you want to keep things hot. They may be bored as well if you are. It can only be accomplished by working together.
The award-winning sex education platform Passion by Kait was founded by sex educator Kait Scalisi, MPH, who also uses an example from her own relationship to emphasize the value of open communication about sexual desires.
“Every new year and anniversary, we each share one new thing we’d like to try in the bedroom,” she says. “Sometimes we decide to try it, and sometimes we keep it for fantasizing and sharing via dirty talk. Either way, it’s sexy and fun way to stay connected and keep our sex life intimate, exciting, and fulfilling.”
2. Role-play outside the bedroom.
It’s not necessary to restrict role-playing to the bedroom. In her private practice, Courtney Watson, a registered marriage and family therapist with a focus on sex therapy, proposes that the two of you get dressed up, go out, and set up a “one-night stand.” Act like strangers the entire night throughout the one-night stand by using alternate identities and bios, and flirt as you just met. Go home together at the end of the night.
3. Watch porn together.
In the words of Morse, “porn doesn’t need to be something you keep to yourself.” “Try to identify a shared interest. It will set the mood and provide you with various role-playing or desired postures. She suggests using erotic literature to play a sexy game if porn isn’t your thing. “Find an erotic book or story, and alternate reading aloud. See how many pages you can read before you find it difficult to control your hands.
4. Create your own erotica.
Watson counsels, “Get a journal to share between the two of you.” The sexual tale is begun by one person, then continued by the other. A week without sex, while you write your steamy story, will make the situation extra explosive. You two will be itching to touch one another by the end of the week.
5. Schedule sex.
As busy as we all are these days, prioritizing sex might require you to schedule it, according to Morse. Although it might not seem like anything sexy, knowing there is time set aside for intimacy can really help build arousal throughout the day. Morse advises taking the chance to be imaginative rather than letting it be just another dull plan on your Gcal. “Plan for different rooms, positions, outfits, etc., rather than just the time.”